Tuesday, January 3, 2012

An Open Letter to Idiot Drivers

Dear Idiot Drivers;

Over Christmas break I drove from Provo, Utah to Tacoma, Washington and back - somewhere around 2000 miles. In my travels I met a great deal of your kind. I found that although by far the highest concentration is located within 100 miles of Provo, Utah, I quickly realized that you can be found anywhere on the highways, in any vehicle.

I am writing this letter to inform you of some factoids which you clearly missed when God was handing out common-sense.

I wanted to let you know that the blinky lights on the corners of my car actually don't mean I want you to speed up and drive alongside me. They indicate where I want my car to go, not where I want your car to go.

I also want you to know that I shouldn't be able to count your nose hairs in my rearview mirror. I'm honored by your desire to be close to me, but there's a time and a place for that, and it's not while we're travelling 70mph.

Also, those white signs with numbers on them - those are called Speed Limit signs. Think of them as a game. Whoever gets the closest to that number on their speedometer wins.

If you decide not to play the speedometer game that's fine. But please don't become the person who's nose hairs I'm counting. As I said before, I'm flattered by the attention, and I can't help but slow down as to bring us closer together.

If you do want to go faster than me, you can always move into the lane to the left of me and go. If you would like to go slower than me and the rest of traffic, please move into the lane on the right. I understand right and left are difficult concepts, but with practice I'm confident you'll come to understand.

This last word of advice is applicable both to driving and to life: just because you can cram yourself in there doesn't mean you should.

It's not that I don't like you, Idiot Drivers. On the contrary, my middle finger loves to come out to see you and my car horn always says hi. I just think you need to consider a permanent relocation, perhaps to Antarctica or the far side of the moon.

Sincerely Yours,

Friday, April 8, 2011

Government remains open; A plea to any random readers.

So as you may or may not have heard, government did not shut down. And while I am grateful that our troops will continue to be paid (and the holster I ordered for my Glock won't get caught up in a shut down postal system), I just want to say a few quick words on the subject.

My fellow Americans, I do not believe we owe the continuance of government to politicians who made a decision out of an concern for the general public. In large we owe it to men and woman who spent months trying to make individuals with opposing political and ideological views look like the proverbial "bad guy." Our political system is a mess with self-serving career politicians who in all likelihood started with good intentions, but were seduced by the trappings and flattering of corporate greed and special interests. And the people we have to blame for this is ourselves.

In a country of 320 million people, a single voice has little impact on the day to day matters of business, power, and politics. But in our united acts we can, little by little, make out Country and our World a better place, if we are willing to start with ourselves.

So let's remember how small differences in belief and ideology, nearly brought the government of the greatest nation on earth to a standstill, and embrace that the ills and shortcomings of our government is a mirror for the errors and shortcomings of our own lives.

As was said by Aesop in "The Four Oxen and the Tiger," United we stand, divided we fall.

As we fix our own lives, we will see our government fix itself. And perhaps one day we can become the people our Ancestors and our Gods foresaw.

Government shutdown? I think not.

As a law student with a nearly useless undergrad degree in sociology, I'm obviously very lacking in any kind of credentials to make any sort of prediction on government. But as I'm a huge cynic with a few remaining vestiges of common sense, I'm going to join the hordes of nameless people who blog their opinions as if they were important. Since my qualifications are basically void, the only basis for any conclusion I make has to be logic and common sense. So I'll start at the beginning.

First, congress is not full of stupid people. Corrupt, elitist, and out of touch with the general public, of course. But not stupid. Large corporations, power-hungry unions, and special interests groups will not fund the campaign of someone they think is an idiot. We Expect out politicians to be smart enough to solve problems, should circumstances ever provide them with an opportunity to do so.

Since Congress is not stupid, we can assume that they won't make stupid decisions. One of the smart decisions people in congress make is to do what they can to keep their jobs (smart for them, not so much for us).

Friday, March 25, 2011

Post No. 2 - Also, a small rant about Utah's HB477

Alright, post number 2. I realized I can post via my BlackBerry, so I think I might actually be able to restart this blog and keep it going.

That introduction turned out to be a lot shorter on paper (webpage?) than it was in my head. So I guess I'll talk a little about current events. Cuz everyone wants to read another nameless person's opinion on the politics of an area they can't even vote in, right?

Note that this entire post is moot, because under pressure from the masses HB477 was repealed (today in fact, unless I'm mistaken). Pressure that I believe was instigated by big media.

Friday, February 11, 2011

First Post

Alright, well this is my first blog post, hopefully not my last but we'll see.
Quick intro, although realistically anyone crazy enough to read this probably already knows me. Name's Shane, I got married November of 2009 and had my first child, Jude, in September of 2010.
I'm currently a law student at BYU, and chances are some of the ridiculous things I blog about will come from that.
My interests involve longboarding, motorcycling, reading classical literature, tweaking my BlackBerry, and playing games with my son.
That's all I feel like writing now, so peace out people.